KAMINEY: an AWE'F'OMELY 'F'EXY movie - A review'

Cast: Shahid Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, Amol Gupte, Deb Mukherjee, Rajatabha Dutta, Harish Khanna, Carlos Paca, Chandan Roy Sanyal, Tenzing Nima, Shiv Subrahmanyam, Hrishikesh Joshi

Music: Vishal Bhardwaj

Director: Vishal Bhardwaj

Producer: Ronnie Screwvala

Writer: Vishal Bhardwaj

Vishal Bhardwaj does it again. After the astounding success of "Omkara", he has doled out a even larger piece of pie to the Bollywood audience, and tastier. "Kaminey" is one of those once-in-a-blue-moon kind of Bollywood movies that ties you to your seat, hanging on to every word and every moment and when it ends, it leaves you fully satisfied.


"Kaminey", for a much-awaited change, is a movie where you can't predict what is going to happen next. It has a wonderfully twisted plot that unravels itself spectacularly around a bunch of mad-hatters, who are totally convincing in themselves, characters in flesh and blood. But yeah, do not forget to be very attentive to every second of the movie. One text in your mobile, or one longing look at that handsome bod sitting two rows away from you may cost you the entire plot of the movie. And there are these snatches of dialogues in Bengali and Marathi. Especially the first twenty minutes of the movie demand your unflinching attention, otherwise you won't be able to get a hang of the characters, the words they speak, the way they speak, and the tone of the film. And once you get used to it, blimey, you can't get your eyes, ears and mind off the screen. The hot bod can wait !!


One must genuinely appreciate the innovativeness involved in the film. The days are over when you see the first 10 mins and predict what the movie is going to be. Vishal Bhardwaj effectively throws in pieces of jigsaw at the audience in the first 15 minutes of the movie, and let them all fall into place in their own sweet time, albeit with the audience's constant application of mind in this beautifully crafted and intrinsically woven dark story of the big bad world.

Tassaduq Hussain, who shot Vishal's "Omkara" too, has again done a brilliant job this time and given the audience a treat for their eyes. The movie is fast, funny, thrilling and keeps you on your toes throughout the entire span.


As for the cast, they rocked, all of them. Shahid plays dual role of two twins: Charlie and Guddu, two as different from each other as chalk and cheese. The only thing common to them is that they both dream of making it big someday. The similarity between these twins ends here. While Charlie chooses a life of earning a few quick-bucks, Guddu prefers being a NGO worker. And no, unlike all other Bollywood masala movies, there is no love lost in between the two brothers. They despise each other, have not seen each other's face for three long years and can do anything to get their own ends met, be it even sacrificing the other. Guddu has a stammering problem, while Charlie lisps, he pronounces 'F' in place of 'S'! Now you know what the title of this review is all about: that is what is movie is- awefomely fexy. Shahid pulls off both these roles with elan ! "Kaminey" does for Shahid what "Omkara" did for Saif - the star has evolved as a versatile actor.

Priyanka Chopra as Sweety is typically the girl-next-door, yet has her head at the right place. She handles herself well, be it while she is drunk and absolutely smitten to have Guddu in bed, that too without the Kamasutra, or when she discovers she has got pregnant, and talks Guddu into marrying her. Or when she pleads with the police to leave her newly-wedded husband, Sweety is amazingly fresh and fits beautifully into her role.

Then there is this range of oddballs, who make the movie click: from Amol Gupte as the 'Jai Maharashtra' gangster Bhope Bhau to the lethally capricious coke-lover Mikhail played into the skin of the character by Chandan Roy Sanyal, from the corrupt helpless cop Lobo played by Shib Subramanyam to Tenzing Nima's enchanting and likable drug-smuggler Tashi - the film brims with all these little known superb actors, besides many others.

Best part about the movie is each of the eleven characters has his time in the spotlight. Guddu recounts his middle-school love while Sweety is charmingly real in her beer-driven arousal. Bhope bribes his nephew with chocolate, while Lobo tries hard to make the stutterer to give a police statement through a song. The Bengali gangsters (Deb Mukherjee, Rajatava Dutta and Chandan Roy Sanyal) are a complete mad "shonamuni puchu-puchu" trio, the Marathi "Jai Maharashtra" stand transfixed by Sweety-Guddu screensaver on a laptop. CHarlie keeps his mobile phone is a plastic wrapper, while Mikhail, high on coke and unpredictable, staggers upon the Marathi gangsters in an extraordinary moment.


There is a witty duality running throughout the length of the movie. Mikhail is astounding, and haunts you till the end of the movie. He kind of combines stunning violence with humour. When he breaks into a Spiderman theme, Charlie responds with an equally ear-catching Fpiderman, Fpiderman. In short, its a lovely piece of writing, the wordplay is continuous, subtle and exquisite, and leaves you wanting for more. Quentin Tarantino and Guy Ritchie are subtly present throughout the whole movie.

Talking of music, Dhan Te Nan has already become a craze. The choreography is amazing, with Charlie and Mikhail doing the rounds.

With all these ranges of characters, its not too hard to love each and every one of them. By the time you reach the end of the movie, you realise that you do give a damn for those bunch of mad-hatters, those corpses-in-waiting. That's when the climax touches you, and you realise "kameenapan". Overall, an awesome movie, a must-see. It will take some time in getting used to. It is not one of those comfort food that Bollywood normally dishes out every Friday. But its taste is worth acquiring.

GO WATCH IT !!

SIMPLE THINGS MAKE LUV: A Book by Komal Thakur

SIMPLE THINGS MAKE LUV

YET BOLLYWOOD, MAFIA, POWER, MONEY CANNOT STOP IT!

by KOMAL THAKUR

Yogi thought that winning Oscars was his only one unfulfilled desire. With Niti, his wife and his luck charm, in his life he has achieved everything else. So after 12 years of 'successful' marriage why would Niti forsake him one day leaving a letter behind?

The quest of answers and a haunted feeling of wanting her more than ever brings Yogi to a compromising situation where he realizes that all his life, he was looking at a mirage.

Niti is not beautiful in a traditional way. She is dusky and born with such a magnetic sex appeal that whoever loves her one time, loves her forever. To Yogi, she is an orphan with no family ties. However, she has a tragic secret in her past. In the past her name was Kinnari.

Kinnari has no interest in going to college. She drinks, smokes, works in a call-centre and wants to live life as simply as possible. Though outwardly against love, her only secret desire is to fall in love and when she does, life plays a game with her. A game of loving and losing. She realizes that her life was an illusion and hides herself behind the security that only Yogi could provide her.

SIMPLE THINGS MAKE LUV is a larger-than-life picture of illusions where the search is orphic and love is dicey.



It was just a few hours back that I finished reading the book that I bought yesterday, very randomly, from National Handloom, Jodhpur. And believe me when I say that I'm still reliving the pages of it. The book has been kind of haunting me since then, the story of a woman created by another, it was the perfect start to my Saturday morning. And now at 4 p.m. when I am writing this blog, things from the book are randomly passing through my brain, yeah not my mind, but my brain, to imply that the feelings and thoughts are pouring in strongly, and my heart is aching at the thought of "Aryan", the male protagonist in the book.

Just a few random excerpts from the book that I loved, from Kinnari's Journal:

• "A thousand things were going on through my mind. Hundreds of voices and memories were speaking together. 'He is not in love with you.' one of the voices reminded me. 'Remember your dreams Kinnari, your dreams of peace in your married life' other voice said. My mind was buzzing with thoughts and the pain of all the years re-surfaced. All my chats with Philo came into focus. Yes, he was not in love with me. There was no commitment. True though every voice was, however, I had learnt to accept that reality was different from what we believe in. It was hard for me to control the possibility of showing my tears to him. My eyes were already full of tears so that the room was getting blurred. And with these blurred eyes, I looked into his eyes wanting to see love there, love for my soul. But there was only desperation. He was pleading to me, he literally was. All I could see were his eyes hungry for my body only and his lips parting only to say, "Please, Please."

• "I saw him stretching luxuriously on the floor. I felt better, so much better about my lost virginity. If it had to be given, it was safely given to the right person. A person I would be able to respect. No, it was just not sex between us. It was him. Aryan, his confidence and ability to take quick and wise decisions. His smartness and the way my body seemed perfect under his scrutiny. I loved it when he hummed or breathed. I loved it when he felt embarrassed when I snapped at him. He allowed me to snap. He allowed me to talk. Would he allow me to love him?"

• "Besides, after each passing day, I began to hate Aryan. I found him ugly and disgusting for some reason. Strange but whenever I was with him I enjoyed his company more than anything else. There was no commitment. I was free. I didn't pretend in front of him nor did he.He was genuinely caring and never interfered in my life. Still, in his absence I hated him. You could call me a fool but somehow I liked it when sometimes he participated in my life, when he gave me suggestions and encouraged me to do something. Still, our relationship was not something to be proud of. It looked more physical from outside as Aryan had neither proposed to me nor given this relationship a name. So, I cursed him whenever I felt guilty about our relationship and that made things easier for me."

• "Look Aryan, look over there, are the trees covered? Are the birds covered? No, they are proud of their body and we adore them. We even adore the beautifully cut leaves that all are green in colour. Today, I want to be like them. You have freed me, freed me from all the negative energy Aryan. I don't feel inferior. Wherever I see, I only see love and beauty. I want to give that love and respect to all of them today. Let us hope, let us make love here."

AND THE BEST OF ALL, MY PERSONAL FAV:

The warmth of your body and the smell of your breath have the power to take me to the peak of paradise where "happiness" dominates all other emotions.

Sometimes at night when you are with me, softly caressing the demands of my body, I feel the flow of God's nature in perfect rhythm with our moans of pleasure. The softness of your skin adds moisture to mine. The hunger in your eyes makes me feel wanted in a way no one has wanted me before. But I don't give in because I want it to last for more and more time. Instead I blush and quickly take out a blindfold from underneath. I put the blindfold around your eyes leaving you perplexed with my motive. Watching our little play, our audience- the clouds, too, begin to dance. The brush of their shoulders causes a soft drizzle of water to add a little moisture on our window. And when I look at it from inside, I know the time has come when my soul will leave my body and find a place in the corner of your heart; a place so sacred with the purity of love and the whiteness of lust.

I miss you Aryan, at the break of dawn, at the peak of sunlight, at the beauty of fantasy while looking at the density of clouds, while shielding myself from rain. I miss you when I see a couple holding hands, when I see the smile of a child, I miss you then.

Slowly I begin to undress you and also help you to undress me. Now both of us are naked, not only physically but emotionally as well. We are stripped of our senses too. I know you can't see me because of that blindfold; but I do, I look at you completely awed by the artistic symmetry of God. The silence of the room is broken by the thunder outside. Should I be scared or not? I don't know. But I know just one thing; I have never felt more safe and comfortable. At that time you moaned a little telling me to come near but I want to play more. Gently, I follow the curves of your body with my finger tip. I move my finger from your forehead towards your cheeks and circle it around your lovely lips. Your lips respond to my motion and a door is opened. I go inside and play with your tongue. Your tongue licks my fingertip and you close your mouth tight shut. I feel the concentration of your hardness. We both become one then.

I lay in your arms, your soft breath whispering in my ears and when I close my eyes, I smile for I know I am finally at home.

Is this it then? I had heard about books that do change the way people look at things, they change their perspectives, change the way think, and change the way they decide to live their lives. Is this book the one for me then? I really don't know. But sure enough, this book has made me think. Once again, I crave to have a true love in my life, someone like "Aryan" who would love me for what I am, in front of whom I won't have to pretend. True, while typing the excerpts from the book, all along I had someone in my mind, and I realised he is not my Aryan, he cannot even be compared to "Aryan". He sure is successful, a guy whom any girl would love to have in her life, but he cannot be my Aryan for me. I crave to find my Aryan, the kind of love I have always dreamt of, and somehow I feel, I would find him someday, maybe in the most random or even the most inappropriate of places, but I will sure find him.

At this moment, I would give anything to live the life of Kinnari, to know love, to feel love, to lie in my Aryan's arms, and to find my true "home".

Luv you Aryan

And yeah, simple things make luv!

HOME SWEET HOME

After a year I'm back at my home once again, the quaint place on James Long Sarani, Behala in Kolkata, the place i proudly call "my home". Nothing has changed here since the one year I was away. Everyone still seems the same. My parents over-protective as usual, my friends over-enthusiastic as usual, my relatives a bit cynical and critical, yet appreciative of me, as usual. The same old faces, yet it was such huge joy to be amongst them once again after such a long time. I'm here only for a month, and that one month is also passing away so swiftly, its already two and a half weeks!! I miss Jodhpur at times, the carefreeness associated with that place, and I miss Delhi a lot, and the wildness and wackyness associated with it, but I know once I go back from here, I would miss Kolkata like hell. Though half of the time right now, my mind is away at some other place (?), yet I am sure once in Jodhpur, my mind would wander around and come back and settle in the coziness of my home. Maybe I wouldn't be coming back to Kolkata and settling down here at the peak of my career, but I know one day I would love to come back to this place, contented and happy, with nothing more to ask from life.

Love you Kolkata..

Love you mom and dad...

You guys would always bring me back to this city, the city of my birth..

And I'm thankful to you dad, for sending me to Jodhpur at a time when I didn't want to go, otherwise neither would I have known such wonderful and colourful (and changing colours too!!) people in my life, nor would I have realised how much this hustling-bustling city in eastern India means to me.

Thank you all...

Something's not going right...

What's wrong with me so very suddenly? Here I am at around 5 in the morning filling up my blog, and that too after more than an hour and a half of useless tries to sleep. Something is bothering me badly, and I guess I know what it is, but either I am too afraid to find out the solution, or I am so very concerned about the person at the other end that I do not want to hurt him at any cost, and find bothering myself over it better than bothering him at all. Situations have been going really good at times, specially I remember one particular day when I was so very happy at the turn things were taking. But now, things seem as bleak as ever. And it bothers me big time. Not that I can show him and tell him where he is going wrong(?), but does it imply that I should cry myself to sleep tonight? Coz I guess that's what is left for me to do now. I understand we are to completely different individuals, with different priorities in life, but can't he be a bit sensitive to my needs the way I am sensitive to his? I understand when he says that he wants things to be serious, but again the next moment he seems a totally different person, who is simply passing away his time to glory. This leaves me stranded alone at the end of the day, with none but myself to blame for the entire way the things have shaped up. His feelings, I understand, his emotions I respect, his needs I fulfill; but what about mine? And he wants himself to be the only one for me, why can't I demand the same? Again, I'm too afraid to hurt him by my words or actions, and watch every word of mine before I say them, and monitor every action of mine before I do them. I guess I am acting as the underdog here, and he is the boss. That is what the entire scenario had been since its inception sometime in January this year. But I hate this helpless feeling inside me, which tells me in my ears time and again that I am choosing the wrong path in my life, and I still move on, with the hope that things will definitely get better some day. I don't know when, but I am waiting, and I guess I will wait for that day to come.

Will go to sleep now I guess...

@ Delhi

Once again, its the time of the year for internship. Once again in Delhi, and surprisingly, this time things in Delhi haven't been fine. The excitement associated with being here all by myself for a month somehow has gone down and hit the bottom, and all I am looking forward now is to go home as soon as possible. Don't know what's wrong, but simply nothing is seeming to go right this time. Putting up in GK-1 this time, I have started hating this place from the first day I came here. Office sucks big time, and timings are really bad. So after coming back, there is no more time left to meet up friends and all. The first weekend was today, and with a hell lot of planning going into it all week long, things went wrong yet again out of nowhere. A situation cropped up where I had none to blame, yet the excitement and planning of the entire week went down the drain. And to top it, my mood has gone really bad suddenly. Office again from Monday, and the Diploma studies to be done, and papers to be written for various conferences, even the stay in Delhi has turned up to be so exhausting and hectic this time.

Badly need a break.........

Osian Calling...

The Desert during the Sunset, Osian



Since the past two days, I am getting this sudden and stupid craving to visit Osian, some ancient village around 60 kms from our campus. It is a desert area, where I have been twice, but still its charm remains. I simply cannot delete the memory of the last time I had been there, it had been an amazing experience, with the sunset and the dusk, and the young crowd from different law colleges of India (it had been a trip for the participants of the M.M. Singhvi Anuual International Moot Court Competition, 2009). The temple, the desert, the bus journey, the jokes inside the bus, the games that we played, all had been amazing, not to forget the tete-a-tete at Chamunda Dhaba, the favourite hangout place of our University crowd.

The day had been amazing thanks to Aakanksha Nath and Mridul Gupta (NLU, Jodhpur), Ujjwal Kacker and Shardul Vats (GNLU, Gandhinagar).

Had an amazing time with you guys...

For more information on Osian, check out this video on YouTube.

BASKING IN THE EXAM DAWN

Ohh yea, with another round of end-semesters around the corner, its again the time of the year to bask in the dawn of the Examination Syndromes, waiting for the dusk to arrive. Its again that time of the year when you wake up early mornings, plan to stick to a strict academic regimen round the clock, and at the end of the day, discover that you have done nothing. Coz its still 2 weeks to go before the end terms, so you still find lots of time to laze around, or just to open your books and stare at them absent-mindedly, just as sometimes your mental wings take you to some other places far away from the campus, sometimes you simply crave for food, sometimes you just wanna gossip, or sometimes, you get this sudden urge to learn playing the guitar. All so, with the constant thought of your examination schedule on your head, that's when you know "ITS NOT FAR AWAY"...


Another thought that constantly jubilates your mind during this time is the thought of leaving your campus soon, and for the lucky few, heading towards home in just 3 weeks time. And for the unlucky few like me, its still another 2 months before I get to go home, for such unfortunate few, its still the thought of getting out of a place like Jodhpur, and heading towards your internship destination, mostly Delhi/Mumbai/Bangalore, where you spend roughly around one more month doing your training, enjoying hanging out with friends, shopping, and most importantly eating out at McDonald's or KFC after a long term of having bland mess food. I seriously think Jodhpur should be coming up with a KFC sooner or later, what about the complete non-vegetarian people out here? We die to get some good chicken here ...

Ohh yea, another heart-breaking news, the only Pizza Hut of Jodhpur has shut down the shutters a week back. Life is simply hell out here...